There’s a headline my colleague missed in his comedic Top 1o list from earlier today.
Anyway, this whole indictment thing really got me fired up, which is odd. I don’t particularly care for Barry Bonds nor do I follow baseball, but the news really got me spittin’ angry. Our federal government has nothing better to do right now? Really?!?! Baseball and steroids are so important that we’re using significant resources to sort it out. Perhaps this is late, as this thing has been in process, but I never really believed that it would come to this.
Let me walk you through the situation as I see it. Bonds is being indicted because they believe he lied about intentionally using steroids. They’re trying to convict him based on intent, in regards to using a substance considered legal not only by the law, but his employer. This reeks of a witch hunt, not a crime. The laws of common sense tell me the only thing Barry is guilty of is several counts of 1st Degree Asshole, which is yet to become a federal offense. If it actually has become a crime, we better be prepared for a full- fledged military occupation of Boston and the surrounding area.
In no way, shape or form should Bonds do any time. The idea that the government intervened in MLB was a farce in the first place and nobody that testified should be punished for the resulting asinine Kangaroo Court absurdity.
Federal government, wake up! If Barry Bonds is even a blip on your radar, you have grossly misprioritized your responsibilities as a public servant. Instead of ill-advised jock sniffing burning, as some kind of retribution for pubescent persecution, focus your attention on more pressing matters like sex scandals, internal corruption or even poverty in the 3rd World… or here’s a novel idea, the war currently going on overseas.
I had the bail bonds idea, I just couldn’t put it into a good phrase.
You are, of course, still the master.