The past week and a half has brought us the news that A-Fraud is actually A-Roid. The fallout across the sports media has really been a sight to see, including the tell-tale polls so you can see what percentage of the state of Delaware feels betrayed by A-Rod as opposed to those who just don’t care. First there was “talk to the union.” Then was the admission to Gammons that he used unknown performance enhancing drugs. Then he blamed the reporter who broke the story. Then today his latest admission included taking “energy boosters” from his cousin. He just threw his cousin under the bus, ladies and gentlemen. Is there anything he could say at this point that would surprise you?
It’s not like he needed to take PED’s to be the best player on the Rangers, either.
Here at Pyle of List our surprise is that everyone thought a guy who became the highest profile player in the steroid era was clean. The way I see it, he was either juicing or needs a pair of glasses and a menial job as a mild mannered reporter at the Daily Globe. But we got to thinking we’d go ahead a blow the lid on some other stories in the sports world that might “surprise” you.
The NBA is fixed
Folks, this might be hard for some of you but refs are taking cash, phantom calls are rampant, and the big rivalry gives the commish wood every time he thinks about it. It’s entirely possible that it’s all coincidence… then again…
Owners care more about money than winning
The Clippers, perennial losers, are one of the most profitable teams in the NBA. The Brothers Maloof are playing a game of chicken with the fine people of Sacramento over funding for a new arena as the Kings wither on the vine. And did you hear about the Sonics? Apparently they’re playing in Oklahoma City now.
The WNBA is full of Lesbians
When Mike Piazza was accused of being gay in MLB in the 90′s it was a huge story. So how blown away will John Q. Public be that some of these female athletes spend a little extra time doing one-on-one drills with their teammates?!
OJ’s deathbed confession
Everyone will remember where they were the day OJ Simpson admits that he stabbed Nicole and Ron in that Brentwood condo. And then everyone will say, “No shit, Sherlock.” (Sorry to use middle school vernacular, but what do you expect from a sports blog?)
Reggie Bush got paid
Some day, maybe after Pete Carroll is no longer coach at USC (God forbid!), the truth will come out that Reggie Bush got paid handsomely from some wannabe agents while he was an NCAA student-athlete. And people will be SHOCKED. I know, it’s hard to imagine that a marquee athlete at a top BCS school would be getting unlawful compensation. Prepare yourself people. It will happen. I just don’t want you to swerve off the road when you hear the news announced by some sports radio jockey on your daily commute. Think of this as a friendly PSA.
College Football Presidents admit the BCS “isn’t the best idea”
I believe in it. I know you believe in it. But the higher ups in college football just don’t think the BCS is all it’s cracked up to be. I suggest taking the day off work when the news comes down and spending it with your local Pastor/Priest/Rabbi. Or a bottle of rum. Same thing, really…
TO is mentally unstable
If he couldn’t play football, he might be hanging out at the nearest off ramp. TO needs attention compulsively. If he ever gets the feeling that we aren’t paying attention here comes the press conference on the driveway doing sit ups or the late night pill binge. On top of that, he has an attention lavishing lap dog of an agent who feeds his addiction… but someday TO won’t make Drew the kind of scratch he does now and TO is liable to set records for insanity… did you ever see “Falling Down”… same concept.
The NHL still exists
While this could be hard for most of the US to believe, it turns out the labor stoppage of a few years ago is over. The NHL resumed play after just one year. You heard me right… the NHL is still playing hockey… the problem is, ESPN figured no one really noticed the disappearance and decided to air World Series of Poker and Scrabble Championships with the time they used to devote to hockey, pulling in about the same ratings.
Farve unsure about retirement
He’s retired, right? We’re sure about this? When he makes himself eligible for a half-season free agent contract later this year, ala Roger Clemens, the old school writers will get in a tizzy about his return. Meanwhile, the younger generations will roll their eyes and pick him up as a backup QB for their fantasy teams.
Kobe is kind of a dick
You mean the rape guy isn’t the next Mother Theresa? That’s weird…
Baseball writers have no idea how to deal with the steroid era
TERROR. OUTRAGE. BEWILDERMENT. HOLIER-THAN-THOU ATTITUDES. These are the emotions that the BBWA will continue to express as more and more of the steroid-era players become HOF eligible. The public will continue to wonder why the hell baseball writers can’t come to grips with reality and get over it. When they should be writing about stricter testing and enforcement going forward, they will instead bemoan that they were duped by the players and the league. Living in the past isn’t only for those losers that live vicariously through their high school accomplishments anymore.
The Yankees and Red Sox don’t like each other.