Being the lazy days of summer, most years my mind would have slowly faded out of focus from baseball and would start to work on college football annuals and fantasy football drafts to help ease the sports starved summer schedule and help my leisure hours maintain a rhythm of sanity until the fall football frenzy took full effect.
This year’s mid august lull produced a counter-cocktail of sorts, allowing the summer to be more enjoyable than most. Not only are my Texas Rangers in a Wild Card fight and looking for their first post season appearance in a decade, but the film industry has decided to produce a rare, late summer jewel that would usually be preserved until Christmas.
My usual August ritual would be to give a short list of non-BCS teams looking to do some party crashing, but my enthusiasm for Quentin Tarantino’s new film. Inglorious Bastards, has tainted my daydreaming of a TCU Fieasta Bowls with the awe inspiring images of splitting Nazi skulls with blunt objects.
Instead of spouting off the typical list of the non-BCS powerhouses, I decided to do the NCAA ignorant a favor; by giving them a crash course of who’s who by giving you each teams respective Tarantino Flavor.
UTAH-KILL BILL VOL. 1
If you need a sports example of the goal oriented, sword slashing, nameless bride in Kill Bill, one would need not look any further than the Utes off 2008. Uma Thurman’s character drug her from one battle to the next, only to end up fighting the Crazy-88’s in the end. If you’re in the mood for an underdog ass-kicking a hundred soldiers, you could rent the movie and fast forward to the final scene, or you could rewatch Utah’s performance in last year’s Sugar Bowl against Alabama.
BYU-KILL BILL VOL. 2
Like Vol. 2, is BYU good? Yes. Do we ever notice? No. Why? It will always be compared to their neighbors cross state. Like it’s cinematic counterpart, BYU will again be a stylish team who will have minor successes and pale in comparison to the all too familiar rival, Utah.
BOISE STATE- RESERVOIR DOGS
An early favorite, with no real competition to deal with until Bowl season, or Pulp Fiction, depending if you talking about the Broncos or the dogs. You’ll notice more similarities, if you consider saying f@#k aloud the same as offensive yards.
TCU- JACKIE BROWN
Neither are the most stylish, nor the runaway favorite of their respective groups. Both are consistently thorough in substance and quality. Although not the first answer out of people’s mouth, some thought would show that they are the best in the group.
TROY- PLANET TERROR
A low level, fun choice, which works better in theory than in actuality. Choosing either one of these as your favorite would cause others to lose a great deal of respect for you.
SMU- PULP FICTION
SMU has no chance to go undefeated. I just forgot about Pulp Fiction. SMU does have a shot at going to their first bowl game in twenty years. Consider it me letting the gimp out.
Love it.
based on the previews alone, who would Inglorious Basterds be?
You homers have been picking SMU every season since (and during) the death penalty. Wake up. Zed’s dead baby. Zed’s dead.